I knew when I started this that is was going to be something hard for me to keep up on. Although, once Brent leaves I'm sure it'll be easier since I'll have to keep him up to date.
We went to the Batallion Ball last Saturday. It's nice to get all dressed up sometimes, and of course, I had the most handsome date there! The empty table sure brought a lump to my throat though. It makes me appreciate every moment that I get to spend with all of my loved ones, not just Brent. You never know when something is going to happen to any one of us. Heck, his hour and a half commute daily is probably more dangerous. Well, maybe not quite, but it makes me feel better to think that.
Tonight, Saturday, (third shift always has my days screwed up) is the Daddy/Daughter Ball in Bushnell. Ashtyn, Brent, and I had a great time picking out a dress and accessories for Ashtyn last Sunday. Yes, I made Brent go shopping on Super Bowl Sunday, but it was early and I think, whether he wants to admit it or not, he had a good time. Any day with a fresh cinnamon pretzel and cookies for lunch is a good day by me.
I also found a dress to wear for the wedding. Nothing fancy, but I guess everyone deserves to feel like a million bucks on their wedding day, even if it is at the courthouse. As I've said before, it's not the wedding that matters, but what you do with all the time afterwards that counts. And I'm looking forward to every second of it!!!
Christmas Hat Day
Mandatory good cheer on our annual shopping trip to buy for each other
Saturday, February 9, 2008
Saturday, February 2, 2008
"Girly Toughness"
So, a few minutes ago I get a message from Brent on my Blackberry that he had checked my blog and it made him lol. He said that the title and picture were great. I'm sure glad he thought so. I was a little apprehensive. I had chosen what I thought was a "girly" layout and then there I went putting a picture like that on it.
When we first discussed the blogging thing Brent wenr with his title of "A Soldier's Story," which to me sounds deep and poetic. It gives me goosebumps just typing it. He had suggested that I join to keep him informed of life at home and could use something to the effect of "Life of a Soldier's Wife." This was actually the title of my blog for the first few days. But, other than the fact that I giggle at getting to call myself his wife, the title didn't work for me. It took me a few days to figure out that it was just too simplistic for me. I was so much more than that.
Now, I'm not saying there is anything wrong with "just" being an Army wife. There is no "just" to it. But, I am so NOT that way. And maybe it's me looking at the all too perfect movie type military officer's wife, dutifully taking care of the other wives, raising perfect children, and just being so brave and stoic. I know that this version of person only exists in movies. Because the reality is that real life happens to mess that all up.
But, other than the fact that I do not live on a base and have no other wives to take care of, I also live such a non-traditional life. While we were on the cruise we met a couple and were discussing Brent's pending deployment. (It came up a lot, mainly because I am so proud of him. You'd think I'd know better since I hate being introduced as Micca, the cop.) At one point the conversation turned to my occupation. I explained what I do. The woman looked at me and said, "And you're worried about him?" That really got me thinking.
Every night Brent gives me a kiss good bye and sends me out into the night not knowing if I'll make it back. Now, we don't live in Chicago or New York City, but things DO happen, even in Tazewell county. And, generally, the most dangerous part of Brent's work right now is the hour and a half commute every day. (I've taken the "drive careful" speech to a new level, just ask him.) I guess I just never paid that much attention to how what I've chosen to do for a career affects my love interests.
My position has always been, this is what I do. If you can't handle it, too bad. And that's why Brent and I have gotten along so well. I understand that he loves the military. Maybe not every little thing that goes on, but over all, it's what he Needs to do to make him happy. And he understands the same about me. So, while I'm not happy about him leaving, I understand that this is the oppurtunity to do the 1% that keeps us going in our professions.
All right, back to the "girly toughness." I guess it's to prove that I'm just that. Complicated. And I don't think Brent would have it any other way.
When we first discussed the blogging thing Brent wenr with his title of "A Soldier's Story," which to me sounds deep and poetic. It gives me goosebumps just typing it. He had suggested that I join to keep him informed of life at home and could use something to the effect of "Life of a Soldier's Wife." This was actually the title of my blog for the first few days. But, other than the fact that I giggle at getting to call myself his wife, the title didn't work for me. It took me a few days to figure out that it was just too simplistic for me. I was so much more than that.
Now, I'm not saying there is anything wrong with "just" being an Army wife. There is no "just" to it. But, I am so NOT that way. And maybe it's me looking at the all too perfect movie type military officer's wife, dutifully taking care of the other wives, raising perfect children, and just being so brave and stoic. I know that this version of person only exists in movies. Because the reality is that real life happens to mess that all up.
But, other than the fact that I do not live on a base and have no other wives to take care of, I also live such a non-traditional life. While we were on the cruise we met a couple and were discussing Brent's pending deployment. (It came up a lot, mainly because I am so proud of him. You'd think I'd know better since I hate being introduced as Micca, the cop.) At one point the conversation turned to my occupation. I explained what I do. The woman looked at me and said, "And you're worried about him?" That really got me thinking.
Every night Brent gives me a kiss good bye and sends me out into the night not knowing if I'll make it back. Now, we don't live in Chicago or New York City, but things DO happen, even in Tazewell county. And, generally, the most dangerous part of Brent's work right now is the hour and a half commute every day. (I've taken the "drive careful" speech to a new level, just ask him.) I guess I just never paid that much attention to how what I've chosen to do for a career affects my love interests.
My position has always been, this is what I do. If you can't handle it, too bad. And that's why Brent and I have gotten along so well. I understand that he loves the military. Maybe not every little thing that goes on, but over all, it's what he Needs to do to make him happy. And he understands the same about me. So, while I'm not happy about him leaving, I understand that this is the oppurtunity to do the 1% that keeps us going in our professions.
All right, back to the "girly toughness." I guess it's to prove that I'm just that. Complicated. And I don't think Brent would have it any other way.
Friday, February 1, 2008
Starting out
Well, everyone says that this blog thing is the way to go, especially when there are thoughts crowding your head. So, here's my deal...
I'm helping my five year old son do his bedtime routine and am dreading the thought of leaving for work in 2.5 hours. I really enjoy the extra time that 3rd shift allows me with my family, but I dread walking out into the cold, lol.
I guess maybe this sharing of my thoughts will get easier as the time goes on. Right now my time is occupied with getting to spend time with my soon-to-be stepchildren, dreading Brent's deployment and trying to get everything straightened out so his absence will go as smoothly as possible. I've never had to deal with this issue before, so it's a little overwhelming. I never thought that 5 days after my wedding I would have to say goodbye to my husband for over a year.
But, I knew the possibility going in. He supports my law enforcement career and I know he loves the career he chose as well. I guess I just hoped we could make it to his retirement without him leaving. Wishful thinking, I know.
I'm helping my five year old son do his bedtime routine and am dreading the thought of leaving for work in 2.5 hours. I really enjoy the extra time that 3rd shift allows me with my family, but I dread walking out into the cold, lol.
I guess maybe this sharing of my thoughts will get easier as the time goes on. Right now my time is occupied with getting to spend time with my soon-to-be stepchildren, dreading Brent's deployment and trying to get everything straightened out so his absence will go as smoothly as possible. I've never had to deal with this issue before, so it's a little overwhelming. I never thought that 5 days after my wedding I would have to say goodbye to my husband for over a year.
But, I knew the possibility going in. He supports my law enforcement career and I know he loves the career he chose as well. I guess I just hoped we could make it to his retirement without him leaving. Wishful thinking, I know.
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